Sorry for the radio silence of late.
This is going to be a bit of a rambling post because I’ve got a hundred thoughts going through my mind and I want to get them all down and then possibly see if I can sort them into a logical “post-quality” order. It may not happen. You have been warned.
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Firstly, despite my blog post title, I friggin’ love my blog. I’ve now been blogging for a full 2 years. That sounds crazy because I only started it when we first moved in our house, to document what we were doing on it and to provide an outlet for all my crazy decorating obsessions. I never in a million years assumed anyone would actually come and read it. The fact that I have readers in the hundreds coming by every single day fascinates me, humbles me, and scares the living shit out of me.
That said, if you are a blogger, you probably know this already: Blogging is hard bloody work. It takes a certain level of commitment. I sometimes feel like I have a part-time job for the amount of hours that even 2 or 3 posts a week seem to take. There are also the growing pressures you place on yourself as your blog grows – the rigorous schedules you adhere to, the guilt you feel if you miss a post or two, the forward planning of organising guest posters if you dare to take a week or two off… and I haven’t even covered visiting and commenting on other blogs which I try so hard to keep up with but experience crushing guilt when I’ve failed yet another week and my blog reader says I’ve got 435 posts still to read.
Why do we do it? Because we love blogging, we love our readers, we love the blogging community. Simple as that.
So where the heck am I going with this? Well, it was my bank balance that alerted me to it. Actually, I lie, it was the ATM telling me I had insufficient funds to withdrawal from my account. I wasn’t withdrawing a huge amount, mind you. A sensible amount to pay for something that I had needed – not wanted, needed. And the money wasn’t there. Shit.
I went home and had a look at my bank account. Aside from my normal bills, petrol, and the very odd night out, most every penny I spend goes on this house. And it seems I’ve been spending more money than usual. Whoops.
I had to ask myself why.
I know its partially from my self-imposed blogging schedule. I had decided ages ago that I wanted to be able to post a project a week. This blog is about DIY and about the progress made on decorating a house – I couldn’t and didn’t feel right about only blogging pretty pictures found on the web. I wanted exclusive content, I wanted to share my own story, my own home, my own projects, my own ideas.
And I have pretty much done that for a while now, I’ve built that momentum as well of getting things done and starting immediately on the next thing. Hell, sometimes not even finishing one thing before I’m starting on the next thing. And in order to maintain that momentum, I’ve been spending money. More money than what I should have been.
The last 3 days I have spent with a steamer in one hand and a scraper in the other trying to get the woodchip wallpaper off the dressing room walls. All the while, W has been down in the cellar plastering. My home at the moment, is in complete chaos with the contents of my dressing room divvied up between three different rooms, my kitchen floor strewn with footprints and a back deck slowly filling with all sorts of plastering paraphernalia. I haven’t had the time to really relax on my week off or stop to clean my house or even decide what wallpaper I want in my dressing room because I’ve got this self-imposed deadline in my head when I want – no HAVE – to share it on the blog. ASAP.
What the f**k?! Am I doing projects to fuel the blog? Or am I blogging to share my projects? The lines have become very blurred of late. I tell myself I can’t possibly show you the dressing room again this week with just another layer of crap removed from it and a pile of sweaty, sticky paper on the floor. I want to show off pretty. But pretty doesn’t happen overnight. It doesn’t happen in a week. It doesn’t even happen every week.
At the moment, here are the things I have going on that aren’t ready to share on the blog:
1. I have a dressing room that’s waiting to be finished and 2 bookcases to be delivered tomorrow.
2. I have a headboard being made which I am awaiting with baited breath but also hoping it won’t be finished until next month seeing as I have no money in my account to finish paying for it.
3. W is working tirelessly to finish up the cellar but at the moment, it is no where near being completed.
4. We just purchased a new cooker to be installed on Saturday.
5. I’m working on a blog redesign which doesn’t seem to be getting off it’s feet at the minute but we’re trying.
In the midst of this, I’m wondering what I’m going to post about as none of the above are blog-ready. So I purchase spray paint for another project in the hallway, a new clock for the kitchen, some new design books, a walking foo dog, an eBay lamp for the bedroom and a lamp shade I’m having second thoughts about… I’ve also got my eye out for a chest of drawers for the bedroom, a pair of chairs that won’t cost the earth to recover for the living room, I added some prints to the living room, another addition to the dining room gallery wall – all these things I haven’t blogged about yet. All of these things which have cost me money.
I need to get a grip. I need to slow down. I need to actually enjoy the things we’ve already done without thinking about the NEXT POST.
This is kind of how I’m feeling lately. Ok, just not as cute.
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So… what does this mean? I’m not – I repeat NOT – abandoning the blog. I love this blog and intend to keep it whether I have 500 readers or just 5. But I’m taking the pressure off. I’m not going to worry that I’m a ‘bad blogger’ or I’ll lose readers or Google won’t like me if I don’t stick to a pre-agreed schedule. I’m not going to feel weird about posting twice in one day and then not again for 3. I’m just going to stop stressing out about it all.
It’s summer – okay you wouldn’t know it considering the weather but – I want to enjoy the little bit of nice weather here and there or sit and watch a film with my boyfriend and not worry that it’s BLOGGING NIGHT AND I’M NOT TO BE DISTURBED.
I just need to chill.
That’s okay right?
I totally hear you. I had a similar blogging crisis last year when I was putting pressure on myself to blog every day and burning myself out. Sure it wasn't costing me money, but it was costing me time with my husband and my sanity! I think unless you really want to blog for a living it's ok to just do what feels right for you. You have no obligation to anyone but yourself. <br /><br />I
Thanks so much hun, have emailed ya :) xxx
im a fairly recent subscriber and i love your blog mainly because of the writing and cheerfulness, its your blog! i love 1 post or 5 posts it doesn't matter :) i would love to read about anything and even if your finish your house i would still love to read the rooms that you find, with the pretty pictures! :)<br />its lovely! :)xx
Thank you so much hun! Really means a lot :) xxx
Aren't we always our own worst enemy?! I sometimes write myself huge lists and feel bad when I don't finish them, when I'm the only one who ever even knew about the list. Have some chill out time and enjoy the sunny weather!
It's so silly all these pressures we totally put on ourselves, isn't it?! Thanks so much for your comment, it's nice knowing I'm not the only one :) xxx
I think we all do this to ourselves at one point no matter how big or (in my case)small our blogs are. We begin to feel this "responsibility" to our readers. The truth of the matter is, I don't know my readers would notice if I skipped a post or two because like the rest of us, they have 400 other blogs they're reading along with mine. I always try to remind myself, if I'
Thanks so much hun, I've sent you an email :) xxx
You relax, my lovely! You know I completely sympathise, and I'll always be around to read what you're up to! (Although, sorry lately it has taken me some time to catch up on your posts.) <br /><br />I have often marvelled at how you and W keep going with the DIY at the pace you do! It's remarkable how much you've achieved in such a short time. So if you want to slow down, you
Hugs right back, sweet thing! I've emailed ya :) xxx
Oh my dear, I'm right there with you. I face the EXACT same problem. And I think it is whatever that made us start blogging in the first place and continue to love blogging that makes us stress ourselves out over stuff like this. The hubs tries to keep reminding me – no one knows what you had in your head that was 'supposed' to be done. No one will know if it takes longer than
Thank you chicken! xxx
Okay first of all, that kitty is adorable. I feel like you do everyday! My sister doesn't really care though. She hasn't blogged in months, but I guess she feels that if she doesn't blog I'll eventually blog about something. As with the rest of our 25 years on this earth I have been there to pick up what she won't lol. I'm sure at some point she'll be ready to blog
Your approach makes so much sense although I have to say, I do love all your projects so no matter how often you post, I'll always be right there to see the progress :)<br /><br />Thanks so much my dear for your comment! And no post can't be made just that bit better with the inclusion of a kitty picture. I must remember that. ;) xxx
Oh dear, poor you! Horrible to feel so stressed, particularly on your week off. I'm sure the rest of your readers feel like me – just enjoying your posts when they come, whenever that is. After all, you don't owe us anything – each post is a treat and no one would want to think of you running ragged and fretting about self-imposed deadlines!<br /><br />I have a blog too (mine's about
Awww thank you SO much, darlin – it means so much to me that I have such awesome readers who are so cool and supportive :)<br /><br />I was looking at those chairs as it goes! Thanks for the glowing recommendation (you never really know when stuff is that inexpensive whether it's going to be good quality) – when my bank balance recovers, it will definitely go on the 'to be considered'
you have every right to slow down. you don't need anyone's permission to make changes. that's the beauty of blogging. there are no rules. there are plenty of bloggers who truly WANT and NEED them to exist but there is room for everyone! <br /><br />i think what you are discovering is you have begun working for the blog instead of the other way around. i have always made mine work for
You rock my world, gorgeous lady. Thank you for your endlessly awesome support, it truly does mean the world to me that despite any stress or perils, there is a very fabulous side to blogging and that my dear, is meeting wonderful people like you. Mwah xxx
ha! i laughed when i read the title and cheered you along as i read the entire post. i'm sharing YOUR post on FB today, you know, since you took the words right outta my head 'cuz i haven't had a chance to write them!!!
Love it!! Thanks so much my lovely!! xxx
I don't have a blog but I feel compelled to read all the posts of the ones I've subscribed to via email. I don't want to miss anything! I do wish that bloggers would only post once or twice a week or sometimes once every couple of weeks! I feel exhausted just trying to read the posts and rarely comment so I can't even imagine what you're going through! Don't worry, we'
I totally know what you mean by the every day bloggers! ;) I am the same, the guilt if I can't comment/read them all – especially because 9 times out of 10 I really want to read what they have to say! Thanks so much, my dear – it does mean a lot to have loyal readers and really do appreciate your support :) xxx
Oh man. I understand every single word of this post and I'm right there with ya! Blogging can suck up your whole life/soul. I'm trying to figure out how to find balance too, not just with money but also with time. It's hard. It's time consuming. And there's so much pressure to grow and top what you've already done.<br /><br />But as a reader of your blog, I'll say this
I've got way too many unfinished projects at the moment – my home is resembling a building site! Eeek! Thank you for your words of wisdom and for your fabulous support, I really do appreciate it! Mwah xxx
Hey, it could be worse – YHL completely ran out of things to post about and had to buy an entire new house to keep their blog going, so as long as you stick to the occasional can of spray paint and item of eBay furniture, you should be grand…<br /><br />In all seriousness though, please feel free to share pictures of piles of steamed wallpaper and scary in-progress cellars – your blog's
Hahaha! That is so true! Guess I should count my blessings ;) Kitties, sweaty wallpaper pics and scary cellars are my speciality as it goes, will see what I can do ;)<br /><br />Thanks so much hun xxx
Haha, you've read my mind… and I hear EXACTLY what you're saying. I'm juggling a lot of things outside of my beloved blog at the moment, and it's therefore suffered… and I worry about it every time a (week)day has gone by and I haven't posted anything. But I'm trying not to. I would never NOT blog, so it's just about waiting until I have more time to dedicate to it
Yes, take a breather! I feel like unless you're blogging for a living, you have no obligation to anything. And even then, it should only be to your advertisers if you have an agreed-upon post schedule. Otherwise, post when you want to post or when you have something to share. I always wonder why people apologize for blogging later than normal or skipping a day … or week. Are there
Hey real homes aren't perfect all of the time. You've made amazing progress in a relatively short period of time. I for one enjoy seeing work in progress as much as completed projects, so don't worry about posting photos that aren't pretty. <br />You aren't obliged to post any time other than when you've got something to say or show, so don't put yourself under